The Night was still young when I picked up him from the hotel. He looked tired…. (Has has been looking tired from the first day of the Jubilee Home Coming). To me he looked completely different from the person I knew some 20 years back.
20 years ago:
He was a very energetic man, caring, loving, laughed and joked much, and most of all, for us, his students, he made an excellent teacher.
He rode his onthel – pit kebo type of bycicle to the campus and home. he poked lovingly the head or shoulder of his students he met on the way to campus…..and the students, we, loved that!
He was the reason I fell in love with the Biblical Study Subject at that time, and decided to write my thesis on the subject. Made critical reading of the texts….
But it was 20 years ago… I am also different person today.
Though I still do some critical readings of certain texts, I have stopped believing that we need to find reference for my life in the text anymore. I dont believe anymore with anything called holy scriptures, I dont believe anymore in religion. But I am NOT denying and I guess will never do, the fact that I grew up in the religion Christianity) and learned many of the good values from it.
Now, that same man was sitting in my car, in the front seat, with me on the driving seat. I was taking him to JIMBARAN RESTO for some relaxing dinner. I really wanted to express my thanks to him, for having been an inspiration to many of us, and to me personally, for encouraging me to study abroad, and for showing me his support in all ways despite his own hard time……
And what I am going to write here was a summary of our talk that evening, in which we two mostly shared our struggle on how to listen to the call to live an authentic life. And I guess, we both were surprised by each other struggles…… We both were surprised by how much we shared same questions about life, religion and religious issues, theology, and what we might want if we have second life…..
the bottom line is, to live an authentic life is both easy and not easy at the same time, you will be a happy person when you do, but be ready that some times, you will also feel lonely, feeling that your friends cannot understand you equally you often tell yourselves, that you cannot understand those people…
I hope to write more details on the second part of this writing.
Jogjakarta, November 2, 2012